Trust Issues

I couldn't have told you I had them
Then I experienced love
and then I suffered through loss
It left it's remninence building walls of distrust
Creating curtains of selfshness
Temptation lurks in every corner
A lick of supple lips
A brush of the shoulder
My eyes divert their gaze
I can't lose compusure
I must stay faithful even if it's against the nature of my being
I can't imagine any lustful satisfaction worth the look of hurt in her eyes

Shallow world

Everyone wants bricks but no one is building houses
Concerned with reaching the top with empty spirits and full pockets
As if the stars don't light your path at night
Girl where you going? slow down
We see the patches on your skin
Black velvet eyes
Hollowed with greed
If I were to bow down we would share the same idol
And I worship nothing of this world
I want to know the joy of embracing love
Relishing a talk with a long lost friend
 Putting someones happiness above my own
 Sacrifice and Perservernce
Reaching the top of a mountain and beholding God's eye
The Great onyx cries
My vision is clear
Euculyptus mind
I see relief she looks jubilant
And she wants me to sit with her
without my worries

new path

So many flowers being spread
My heart burns to see them go
How can I witness your growth from so far away
But as a mother sees her seed off I'll let you be
 Blurred vision a picture of my last sight of you
wild flowers that spread spontaneously
I'll always know that first seed

The longest night

Emotionally naked and exhausted
Sick with helplessness, stuck in confusion
Because I saw you there
 Laying on the cold filthy checkered floor
The white spots now turn to grey
Wetness dampens your corduroy pants
A puddle of urine accumulates under your limp body
I wanted to cradle you in my arms
I couldn't bare to watch your descent
Young queen whom I barely know
Don't be scared of enlightenment
Fighting the truth will leave you screaming for a savior
Hush, hush I know the feeling
Is this it? Is life really this simplistic?
Will we be together in the end?
Will God forgive me for killing apart of myself?
No this is not a dream sweet thing
Push through the darkness to be born into light
Glistening gold flecks in the air
Catch your strength and never let go
There are things that want to devour you  in slow miniscuial bites
But salvation is merely a step away
Forget their doctrine they use to keep your spirit in a box
Don't run from me I'll be here tomorrow
waiting with a smile
I'm neither friend nor foe
I am you

rain smell

Listening to Baths rain smell
Remember the heart ache I felt 
I kept the song on repeat that night 
As if it could wash away the pain
But the distress was too deep to reach
So I laid my head down on our burgundy couch and covered my vulnerability
Now here with you I hear the familiar tune and tears well up in the sullen pockets of my eyes
Before I realized they were there 
You wiped wiped them away
Put your arms around me and told me
"I never want to see you cry"
it was in that moment I realized how lucky am I 
to know real love now 
I'm not naive enough to think you won't ever hurt me
But that you care enough to try not to 
Tells me you are what I need 
And I your faithful pupil are more then ready to learn 

you win

Sex with you is like running a marathon
The whole time I think who will reach the finish line first
Because I hate running
I decide to let you have it
 One because your faster
Two because someone deserves some satisfaction for this fucked up situation
This race use to be so invigorating
I would have run against you for hours
But now I close my eyes
So you can't see the secrets of my emotions
And I can continue this charade of love

womanly love

Tell me about her, the one you love
It is as if her soul traveled from the motherland
Bringing ancient wisdom and compassion
Her skin glistens like the chrystalized ground of Africa beating songs of the sun
Her voice is soft and timid which she never raised even in confrontation
I'm overwhelmed by the wave of her smell
It draws me in like a moth to a flame  intensifying my feeling of wanting to be nearer to her
I am encompassed  by my desires
 To feel her mocha cheek nestled against mine
Our thighs dance ribbon patterns
As our lips seal the ends
I get lost in her pools transfixed by her beauty
I stiffen my legs unable to relax afraid of this being our last time
Afraid that I would be a slave in these pools unable to free myself of her love
What if she were to leave you?
I'd drown, not wanting to be saved
The memory of her would torment my  days
Loneliness would devour my hand
And I would give into hopelessness
If someone so kind and so ethereal couldn't love you
Then who my dear will stay